Sleep is essential for all of us. It is especially important for infants and toddlers as their brain is rapidly developing as they grow. Yet, sleep is one of the most common challenges that parents and caregivers of children aged three or younger seek help with from Early Intervention Services.
When an infant or toddler is not sleeping enough, there is often impact on other members of the household. Mom and Dad may be exhausted, frustrated, and losing patience. A sibling’s sleep may be disrupted as well. If a child is not getting enough total sleep and family members are feeling the effects, this is when we encourage parents and/or caregivers to reach out to us at Early Intervention Services. We are fortunate to have a highly-skilled and experienced staff that includes certified sleep specialists who can meet with you and your child to learn more about what is going on and provide ideas and suggestions to consider.
Our Approach
Parenting does not come with a how-to manual. All of us learn as we go and do the best we can. At Early Intervention Services, our approach is family-focused, with suggestions and approaches that are incorporated into a family’s daily routine, accommodating each family’s values and cultures. Our services are flexible and adaptive to each family’s unique situation.
As such, we start with an evaluation which is an opportunity for our multi-disciplinary team to meet with you and your child to listen and learn. Our goal is to understand more about your child and their sleeping habits. Examples of some of the questions we may ask to understand more about what is going on include:
How many total sleeping hours in a day is your child getting?
Is the child napping and at what times during the day?
Tell us about your bedtime routine.
Where is the child sleeping at night?
Is the child getting up during the night and, if so, how frequently?
Are they regularly falling asleep in their car seat?
Answers to such questions help our staff offer suggestions to address your concerns and to help you and your family consider ideas that may help your child sleep more.
Goals for a Child’s Sleep
The primary goal related to a child sleeping is to ensure the child is getting enough total hours of sleep so they are rested and energized. All human beings function better when sufficient sleep is received.
Quality sleep is important. A quality nap should be a minimum of 45 minutes to provide benefit. As our certified sleep consultant explains, every human being rises from deep sleep naturally typically between three to four hours. We tend to go right back to sleep so most likely do not even remember this transition. The goal is to have an infant or toddler able to fall back asleep on their own when their sleep cycle hits that three-to-four-hour timeframe. This is not realistic for an infant less than four months old, as developmentally they have not yet achieved an important milestone where they have learned to fuss or cry to get attention. Prior to four months old, they are naturally crying or fussing because they are hungry or need to be changed.
Common scenarios that may negatively affect sleeping habits for a child
Every child is different and there is not one formula that will help every child sleep more and through the night. However, below are three situations that you may want to assess to see if any of these may be affecting your child’s sleeping habits.
- It’s too quiet.
Normal noise is encouraged. Speak in your everyday voice. It is beneficial for a child to learn to fall asleep with normal ‘household’ noise happening. Many new parents try to have absolute silence; they are whispering while the baby is sleeping and walking around quietly. We encourage you to let life happen around the infant and toddler as they nap and go down for the night. Let the dog bark and the cell phone ring. - The sleeping area is not separated
To help an infant or toddler sleep and learn to fall asleep on their own, it is important that they have some visible barrier to not be able to see you or others that may distract them as they try to fall asleep. Setting up a screen or hanging a bed sheet creates a simple and safe ‘barrier’ to set off their sleeping area whether in a crib, toddler bed, or bed to help them close their eyes and not be stimulated by seeing others. - Moving a sleeping child
It is recommended to not regularly have a child fall asleep in one place and then move them to another for the rest of the night. This disrupts the child’s sleep and may make it more difficult for the child to learn how to fall asleep on their own.
Some Tips to Help Improve a Child’s Sleep
Chrissy Villeneuve, Developmental Specialist and certified sleep consultant at Partners in Child Development’s Early Intervention Services, shares tips that have helped many families she has worked with over the years. These are suggestions that you may want to try to see if these help your child (and your family) address your concerns about your child’s sleeping habits.
- Try an earlier bedtime.
Parents and caregivers raise concerns when Chrissy suggests trying to put the child to bed earlier. Their concern is that the child will wake up too early in the morning. With Chrissy’s expertise and experience, she is confident the child will sleep longer and be better rested for the next day and has consistently found this to happen when adopting an earlier bedtime. Give it a try and see how it goes. - Establish a bedtime routine that is not in the bedroom.
For children where the bedtime routine is becoming a challenge with the child wanting another book, more water, or another hug, Chrissy has suggested moving the routine out of the bedroom. Perhaps while dinner is being fixed, there is discussion about getting ready for bed, agreeing to how many books will be read and having the toddler select the number of books in advance. A plan is in place, and when the books are read, it is reiterated that it’s now time for bed and they go to the bedroom to complete the routine. - Prepare a bedtime routine that has visual references
Chrissy has found that visual references of the steps in the bedtime routine can be helpful for a toddler to see and understand what is going to happen every night. Perhaps there are 3 circles and the first is brushing teeth, washing your face and hands and going to the bathroom; then the second circle depicts reading two books and the third is being tucked in and hugged/kissed good night. The child gets used to the routine and the order of what happens to get ready to go to sleep. - For older toddlers, introduce the concept of three calls.
Not staying in bed once put down to sleep can be a challenging time of the day for parents and caregivers. It is later than you wanted and the child is not staying in bed. For an older toddler, you may want to try the idea of having 3 calls for mom or papa or nana. They call out for you to come in the room, you check on them and you inform them that they have 2 more calls. Perhaps you use a popsicle stick or something visual that they have next to their bed to start understanding. Over time, Chrissy has found that toddlers understand the concept of limits to how many times they can call out or get out of bed and the behavior changes. - Prepare for vacation or changes in where a child will be sleeping
A change in where a child will be sleeping can be challenging and disruptive to a child’s sleeping patterns. If you are planning a vacation or trip, Chrissy recommends practicing where the child will be sleeping. If they will be sleeping in a pack and play, set up the pack and play in a highly trafficked area where you live prior to the trip as a test and have the child try it out for a night or two before you go away. Parents have thanked Chrissy for this advice in preparing for a fun vacation that includes good sleep for all.
It is important that caregivers and families are ready to work on improving the quality of sleep for their toddler or infant.
The earlier the sleeping problem is addressed, the easier it will be for the child and family to make improvements. Chrissy has found that working with families while a child is still sleeping in a crib is easier than when moved to a toddler bed. Either way, improvements in sleep are possible and Chrissy has worked with families with children of all ages with sleep challenges.
If you know of a family with a child three years or younger, who is experiencing challenges with sleep, we encourage you to reach out to Early Intervention Services, one of three programs that comprise Partners in Child Development. We work with families and children in the Greater Lawrence and Greater Lowell communities including Andover, Methuen, North Andover, Lawrence, Billerica, Chelmsford, Dracut, Dunstable, Lowell, Tewksbury, Tyngsborough, and Westford.
We welcome the opportunity to learn more about your child so we can help improve their sleep—and help you and your family feel more rested, too.
